Glamour is having a curious run right now: Of its last covers, Alicia Keys for March and Chrissy Teigen for April were great, but The Women Issue (featuring Girls) and the recent Kerry Washington attempt were highly problematic. I hoped the pendulum would swing back, but instead, it did a full 360 around the dial and then whacked me in the mouth. Because this. This. I do not like green wings and ham. I do not like it, Glam I Am.

The interview, which starts out a bit like nervous small talk, warms up into some nice exchanges between Priyanka and her Indian-American interviewer (a detail that is relevant to their discussion). It’s a shame the themes of being comfortable in one’s skin are fronted by this photo, in which she looks like a bird attempting to do yoga against a gale-force wind. Please explain to me the logic of doing this to Priyanka Chopra, who is so absurdly pretty that she could wear the same stuff every week on season one of Quantico and not only have it not look boring, but inspire people to buy an arsenal of waffle tees. Priyanka is a Bollywood megastar, a Hollywood player now, and has a Pantene contract. So it makes ZERO sense to me why they’d look at her and think, “Okay, perfect. Let’s HIDE her fabulous hair, stick her in a seafoam fitted sheet and some heinous Dior underpants that crease strangely, and then find the one marginally awkward angle for the part of her face that isn’t partially obscured, shoot slightly up her nose, tell her to open her mouth like she’s Jessica Simpson in a shoe ad, and then — the masterstroke — SCRIBBLE shit all over her.” This cover is not anyone’s summer anyone’s way. I reject it entirely.